JOURNAL # 17 on revision: What did you do?  What did you focus on?  How was it different than the last time you revised your work after peer review?  What have you learned about your writing process?

JOURNAL # 17 on revision: What did you do?  What did you focus on?  How was it different than the last time you revised your work after peer review?  What have you learned about your writing process?

7 thoughts on “JOURNAL # 17 on revision: What did you do?  What did you focus on?  How was it different than the last time you revised your work after peer review?  What have you learned about your writing process?

  1. There was a few things I revised in terms of this paper. I feel like overall I created a good template for my paper so far. The first thing I went back and did was put commas in the correct spots, and removing them where they were not necessary. The main thing i did during revision was adding evidence to the points I already made. This involved going into the two sources I’m using and help back up the points I made. I also went into more detail about the point I made with the hunting vs grocery shopping and talking about how we can meet in the middle. This time revising was more familiar than the last one. I knew more for what to look for in terms of grammatical structure. I also was a lot more accepting of the comments people made and didn’t take offense to what they’re were saying. Whether I agreed with the point they made or not I appreciated what they had to say for advice. During my writing proccess I’m startin g to really just enjoy the process, the trials and tribulations when it comes to writing a paper. My writing is starting to get more diverse and I can touch on many different points in just one paper. In high school I remember writing papers and only locking in on point. I feel now my papers are much more versatile and really take a deep dive at multiple point of views.

  2. After reviewing all of my peer review comments memorized, I made many revisions to my paper. I read through the comments thoroughly and I realized all of the many corrections I needed to make. I think that once someone looks over my paper I get a lot of corrections that I didn’t realize I had to make. I am thankful for my peer review partners because I feel like their comments really helped me make my paper a lot better. I focused on grammar. While I am writing, I don’t really notice my grammatical mistakes. Another thing I did was make my thesis stand out more. My thesis statement was a little all over the place before I got comments on how to fix it. I really shaped it up and made it a lot more concrete. I made it way more focused on what my paper is actually truly about. I think overall it really helped the focus of my paper more. Reading it over after the peer review comments and after making all of my many corrections I think it got a lot better. It was different from the last time I worked on revising my paper. I feel like after doing paper one, we all are a little bit more experienced in the peer review process. It was wicked helpful to have actually well written criticism. I have learned a lot about my wiring process through revisions. I feel like before peer review, my papers are usually a little messy and unorganized. I really enjoy the process of peer review because it makes my paper a lot better. I have made sure I have proper writing skills and proper grammar. I think that having comments made about my paper really helps me think about the reader’s point of view.

  3. I believe my writing process in Project #1 is extremely different compared to project #2. For this project, it took me way longer to be able to figure out what I wanted to say. Opposed to the first one, I was able to generate my opinion right away and explain my reasoning why. It took me all the way until my conclusion when I was writing my second draft until I realized what it was I really wanted to say. As I figured out my claim, I used pieces from my essay that I liked and threw away other ones. Different from the first project, I actually was able to acknowledge both sides of the argument and not target one specific group. I believe in my last essay I made a horrible attempt at using a “They say”, instead I just blabberred on. In this paper, I believe I used a strong thesis statement but also used a they say. I acknowledged the other side of the argument and then carried on as to why my point was correct. This essay felt way more opinionated than the last one we wrote, and I felt that I was actually able to incorporate my ideas and back them up with texts we have read in class.

  4. I added a lot to my introduction. I attempted to invite the reader in by making my thesis more of a discussion topic than a concrete claim. To give context, I opened with what people consider and don’t consider about food. To give context on the essays I would be digging into, I introduced and summarized Wallace’s and Pollan’s essays. I made my own moral senses about food clear, and ended the introduction with my thesis. In the body of the essay, I mainly focused on getting the main points of my paragraphs to relate to the thesis. I listened to what my peer review teammates said and trimmed down my quotes, merged sentences together, and made my writing smoother. Also, I tried to add some better topic sentences. I explained who Joel Salatin is and his importance. A small thing I revised was removing references to Mann’s essay, because I didn’t realize that I only needed to work with two essays. I added another Barclay paragraph between Wallace and Pollan on the subject of culture and background, and I contrasted them to exemplify how culture impacts how people consider animals. I made sure to introduce and explain each quote well. Finally, I added a conclusion. I made an effort to make my conclusion not sound exactly like my introduction. My writing process this time was a little different from project #1. I was a little off schedule with my drafts, and I wasn’t really in a flow. My peer review this time had less advice, and was more vague. I feel like I was given a little less direction this time. I learned that if I want to get work done on an essay, I shouldn’t wait for a “perfect moment”. I should just start writing and let the ideas come to me.

  5. After I had thoroughly read through both my peers’ comments and my essay again, I went through and made many revisions to my paper. I wanted to make sure that I mapped out everything that I wanted to add or change in my draft, so I made an “outline” of my plans. I wanted to focus on what my peers had suggested before I went back through and edited the paper for grammar and spelling. I made sure to incorporate any ideas that my peers had where I thought they would fit best. One of the major things that both of my peer reviewers mentioned was about my transitions. I went through and made sure that I had transitions that not only made sense but made transitioning from paragraph to paragraph smooth. I feel like I took more time and actually listened to my peer review comments this time around better than last time. I also had to go through and make major changes throughout my essay because I incorporated too many sources in my draft. I think this step was easy for me because my review comments were really helpful, and my peers had given me a lot of great feedback to help me change things up. I think that the feedback I had gotten was helpful for me and allowed me to make changes to my essay that had an impact. I have learned how important peer reviewing is in the writing process. Having multiple sets of eyes on my work helped catch any errors in my writing and overall allowed me to make it better. I think that the revision process is a lot easier to do when you have some great feedback to work with. I think the entire revision step was easier to do for this project than for the last one.

  6. For my revision of my Morals vs Lobsters essay I reread my last journal to jog my memory on what I need to focus on. I first started by going through my peer review comments my group left on my essay and fixed all of the easy and simple errors like grammar or punctuation. Once I fixed all of those I went back and look further into the more complex comments like telling me to elaborate on certain points, add quotes to back up my claim, and fixing my formatting for some of the paragraphs. Peer review is incredibly helpful for my writing because it takes an outside perspective to help me understand exactly what I need to make my essay stronger. In the beginning of this writing process I created a simple outline to how I wanted my essay to go. As I wrote, those plans changed but I made another outline of what my essay now presents just to make sure my order of paragraphs and the topics of each paragraph worked together and overall just made sense. Then I read through my entire essay out loud to make sure it sounded smooth and flowed nicely. I focused on my thesis for a while because I wait till the end to add it to make sure my thesis includes all points and opinions I express in my essay. I then made sure all of the MLA formatting was correct like the page numbers, in text citations, quoting, and my works cited page.

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